Letra de Cantina

Well, I went down to Mos Eisley for a converter
Hell, ya know how hot it gets on Tatooine
Well then I saw that there cantina
I´ll go in for an Orangina
I heard it was rough but how bad could it be?

Well I walked through the door and the music stopped--dead
All manner of man and beasts were starin´ at me
Seems just one week before their Twi´lek slave girl walked out the door
And I guess I was the next best thing they´d seen

I lost more than my heart in that cantina
I left my manhood there on Tatooine
Son, it don´t mean you´re weak if you turn the other cheek
But if you spread ´em both for Jabba, son, you ain´t a man!

I was hit over the head by ol´ Han Solo
I´da never guessed that pirate was a homo
I woke up next to Chewbacca
I was smeared in Wookie caca
And what they did to my poor nipples was a no-no!

Ol´ Greedo greedily grabbed his green weenie
And he yanked that sucker til it wasn´t so teenie
He pulled me into Jabba´s hut
He stared intently at my butt
And then he oota-toota´ed me with his zucchini

I lost more than my heart in that cantina
I left my manhood there on Tatooine
Son, it don´t mean you´re weak if you turn the other cheek
But if you spread ´em both for Jabba, son, you ain´t a man!

Well, a guy walked up and said "My friend doesn´t like you."
I said ´Sorry.´
He said ´I don´t like you either, you better watch your self!´ - I think his name was Tom Waits
And then some old dude who taught Vader
Chopped his arm off with a sabre
That later made for one red hot anal invader - owwwww

I was broken on the floor beat to a stupor
Then I was saved! There at the door were 10 storm troopers!
But then my hope faded away,
I didn´t know they cloned ´em gay
And they each took turns storm troopin´ me in the pooper

I lost more than my heart in that cantina
I left my manhood there on Tatooine
Son, it don´t mean you´re weak if you turn the other cheek
Which is why I still go there every week!